The Chinese Adopt Private Property

Civilization Headline

"The Chinese adopt private property"

Tell me that this headline is not straight out of Sid Meier's Civilization! I am sure that the real reason the People's Party moved to protect private property was something like this:

Beijing, Office of the President of the People's Republic of China. A massive, modern executive desk dominates the room, It is empty except for a small Japanese sub-notebook, and an intercom. Behind the desk, a big, comfortable looking office chair. Behind the chair a framed portrait of Chairman Mao Zedong. A door opens to the left. Hu Jintao enters, with his back to the room, shouting.

Hu: I do not care! Dissidents, Schmissidents. Just shoot them or whatever! I am not to be disturbed!

Slams the door.

Hu: Fucking amateurs. Now, back to the capitalist swine. Death to all Americans!

Sits down at the laptop. The starting melody of Civilization I plays.

Hu: Ha, a few more turns, then I will have Gunpowder, and my Musketeers shall crush your puny Civilization!

Laptop: The Americans adopt the republic.

Hu: Big fat help that will be. I got Communism since turn 15. Hmmm, how to raise more money, I need a bit for my war chest.

Laptop: The Chinese adopt private property.

Hu: That helped. Look at the gold rushing in. Private property always fills my coffers, he he... ... ... Wait a moment.

Presses a button on the intercom. A buzzing sound is heard

Ming: Yes, President?

Hu: Ming, do we have private property in the People's Republic?

Ming (shocked): But of course not, Sir! Chairman Mao abolished it back in '53!

Hu: Well yes, yes. Times change, you know. I am sure he meant it as a temporary measure or something. We shall reinstitute it forthwith. Hop to it, Ming!

Turns back to his laptop

Hu: And now, Americans...